I grew up a typical pastor’s kid. Late Saturday nights and all-day Sundays were spent running around my parent’s church, hiding in the offices, running through the chairs in the sanctuary, and playing with friends. It wasn’t until I hit jr. high where I realized my life looked a little different than the rest of my peers. I wasn’t allowed to do a lot of things they were. Staying out late, parties, having boyfriends, etc. This caught my attention and steered me in the wrong direction. I soon found myself lost in the things of this world. Dating non-Christian boys, sneaking out late at night, partying, and alcohol quickly consumed me. After some years of chasing the wrong things and coming up feeling incredibly empty and purposeless, somehow my heart cracked open, and He finally got my attention. It was a Sunday in September 2012 when it all changed for me. I was sitting front row with my parents at church when a flood of tears took over me. I had a moment of clarity that I had been ignoring for some time. It had been a conversation after my high school graduation about what I wanted to do next and bible college was an option, but it always went in one ear and out the other for me. My heart has always been sensitive in the worship moments at church, and it was in this setting that the Lord grabbed hold of me. I knew what God wanted me to do. I leaned over to them and said, “I know what I need to do. I want to go to bible college.”
In January 2013, my 19-year-old self said goodbye to friends and family and moved across the world to attend bible college in Sydney, Australia. The Lord quickly took over my heart and my life, and I’ve never looked back. I spent 3 years there immersed in church life, ministry, leadership classes, and friendships that would last a lifetime. I met my husband there and all our best friends, who we still do live with to this day. I had a complete transformation overnight. He gave me a new heart and put a new spirit within me. He took my heart of stone and gave me a heart of flesh. (referencing Ezekiel 36:26). The Lord has been faithful all the days of my life. He’s never failed me. His goodness, grace, and mercy were upon me in every moment, even when I didn’t know it or understand it. All the years my parents spent pleading with the Lord for my life had come to fruition. As a mother now to two beautiful girls myself, it’s the only thing I could ever ask from the Lord. That he be as faithful and merciful to them as he has been to me. That they never turn away from Him. If I could encourage any parents who are praying for their child to come to know the Lord, I would say, never give up on your children, no matter how hopeless it might seem. It wasn’t one giant magical moment for me. It was little by little, subtle whispers from the Holy Spirit, years of prayerful parents, and one faithful God. My life and my world have forever been marked by the power and steadfast love of Jesus.
Our son was sitting outside on the side of our home after we had told him that he had to leave by midnight that night. We had spent years doing everything we knew to do to help him: praying, drug counseling, a year in Teen Challenge - to no avail. He told us he had no place to go and that he wasn’t going to leave.
My husband went outside and told him, “Son, your mom and I have been married a long time, and this is putting a wedge in our marriage, as we are not on the same page. I was convinced that tough love was needed.” With that statement, our son said to his father, “I’ve messed up my life, but I don’t want to mess up your marriage. I will be out of here by midnight tonight.” With that, he went out in the night… He was 2O years old.
The one thing about young rebellious kids is they will find other kids, other families to live with to figure it out until they can go on their own. He had a great work ethic, which helped him find work and grow up while still doing his addictions. We knew he could not come home with all of his addictions, because there were two younger sisters in the home that were not getting the attention they needed because he had drained us emotionally.
He remained struggling all those years until…….
Close to his 33rd birthday, I felt the Lord speak to my heart to bring him back home. I didn’t want to do it, but when I came home from work that day, I shared with my husband what I felt I heard the Lord say. My husband said the Lord had spoken to him a couple of weeks before, and he was just waiting for the Lord to speak to me. We then invited him to come home. He arrived with all of his addictions, but there was a gentler side of him coming through the door.
On the night before his 33rd birthday, I spoke to him these words, “Son, the Lord Jesus died in the 33rd year of his life. What if you began to live in this new 33rd year of your life” and with that my husband and I went to our bedroom. Later that evening prior to midnight we had a knock on our door, and our son came in and said “Mom and Dad will you bless me?” You’ve never seen two parents jump out of bed so fast. We laid hands on him and we blessed him.
That night, after asking forgiveness and repenting of his sins to the Lord Jesus, he went out to the street and threw his pornography, tobacco, drugs and alcohol into the drain. He returned home and slept unassisted for the first time in many years. When he awoke the next morning, he knew the Lord had miraculously delivered him of those four addictions.
He wanted to first speak to our pastor to share what happened. He also went to a group of women that met every Sunday after church, praying for the prodigals in our church. Aware they had been praying for him, he shared his victory and thanked them. Later that week, he shared with his father and me what had happened the night before his 33rd birthday.
To this day he drinks alcohol when socially appropriate but never out of control. None of the other addictions have been in his world again. This summer at age 45 he just got married to a most beautiful lady. For years, their dates were long walks as they got to know each other. He knows and loves her family as she loves his.
God is faithful! Never stop praying! We have not because we ask not. Finally, Gods’s timing is always perfect.
I grew up in a loving, Christian home. Church and following Jesus was the foundation of our family. As long as I can remember, everyone in my world knew that I was a Christian. Every summer as a child, I would invite my friends at school to VBS. As I got older, the invitations changed to youth group. I was the church girl. If the kids on the playground said a bad word and happened to see me standing by, they would always apologize. That kind of bothered me.
After I graduated from High School, I went on a month-long trip across the country. When I returned, the church I had attended for years had dissolved. My youth group no longer existed and the friends I had from it had gone in all different directions. We were still friends, but we were no longer a unit and no longer had spiritual leadership.
I got a job and started attending the local jr. college. I began making new friends. These friends didn’t know anything about me. These friends didn’t apologize for cussing in front of me. It dawned on me that I didn’t have to be different anymore. I could be just like them, and included in all the things they did if I just wasn’t a Christian. So I began to embrace the things they did and reject the faith I had grown up in. At first, it felt amazing to throw off those shackles of religion and do whatever I wanted. One day, while I was at the beach drinking with friends, I saw two of the most popular girls from my high school. They were delighted with my newfound “freedom” and told me, “if we had known that you partied, we would have hung out with you more.” Wow! That was all it took to be accepted into the “in” crowd? Sign me up!
Everything was fun, at first. However, I slowly began to notice things about myself I didn’t like. I was more anxious than I used to be. I always worried that I was being left out of something. I was certainly more promiscuous and self-centered. I could see myself hardening. I didn’t like it, but I didn’t know what to do about it.
The obvious answer would have been to return to Christ. The problem with that was that I had some issues with God. During my wandering from Him, I had allowed myself to give full vent to some of the things that had always bothered me. Why couldn’t I hear Him speak to me? Why was there so much suffering if He was good? Why couldn’t I understand the Bible? To be honest, I was mad at God because I didn’t believe He had been all He was cracked up to be.
My parents were concerned. They were praying and struggling to know what to do. One day my mom invited me to try out a new church with her. I was not excited about that. She knew the way to coerce me to do anything was to offer new clothes. She told me she would buy me a new dress if I went. After a shopping trip to the mall, off to church we went! The church was putting on an Easter production that evening. My mom wanted to go. Since there were some cute guys in the church, I agreed to go with her. I was not expecting what would happen next.
The play was exactly what you would expect from a church with a small budget. Since I knew the story well and the acting left a lot to be desired, I knew that this cheesy performance would have no effect on me. Then they go to the scene where the soldiers were nailing Jesus to the cross. With every hammer blow, I felt my heartbreaking. I wanted to cry, but my mom was sitting right next to me, and I couldn’t let her think that this thing was getting to me. I thought about running out of the church, but that wouldn’t work either. I clenched my fists, ground my teeth and forced those tears back. That was a close one, and I was happy to get out of that place and back home.
I needed to focus on something else so, after my parents went to bed, I popped in a movie, The Return of the Jedi. Just before the scene where Luke saves his father, I heard the Lord speak to my heart, “turn the movie off, I want to talk to you.” I can’t even tell you how I knew it was God, I just did. I argued back and told Him that the movie was almost over and we would talk then. God spoke to my heart again and said, “why should I still be here when the movie is over?” For the first time, I felt scared because I knew I didn’t deserve the attention of God. What if this was my last chance for relationship with Him? I turned off the movie and got my Bible.
I waited for the Lord to speak again. What did He want to say? Where should I read? Nothing but silence. I got mad. I said to the Lord, “isn’t this what you always do? I want to hear you speak, and you don’t say a word.” I decided I would take matters into my own hands and just start at the beginning of the New Testament. I turned to Matthew. I saw “Matthew” at the top of the page. I began to read. This wasn’t Matthew! Where were the genealogies? Where was the birth of Christ? I had never read these words before. This was God giving a rebuke to people who had taken Him for granted and spoken things about Him that weren’t true. I looked back to the top of the page, and it said, “Malachi.”
I sobbed as I read the entire book of Malachi and saw myself in these hard-hearted people. I asked the Lord to forgive me for being just like them and to cleanse my sins through the blood of Jesus. I have never been the same. Scripture came alive to me after that! I couldn’t get enough of it and kept thinking, “has this always been in here?” I completely fell in love with my Savior, and I continually thank Him for the grace and mercy He gave me that night.
I call that night my “Malachi moment.” Now I have my own adult children who have walked away from the God who loves them so dearly. As I write this, I am praying they, as well as your children, have a Malachi moment of their own, where the Lord speaks directly to their hearts and draws them back to Him.
To say I was once a prodigal is a completely accurate statement. I was once so far away from the Lord and just living for myself and my selfish ambitions.
I grew up in church my whole life. My Grandparents and Parents are very strong in their relationship with the Lord. Their godly heritage and continued prayers would one day shape my future and prepare the way for my great hunger and desperation for Yeshua. It would break the veil for me to see who I am and whose I am.
As a young teenager, I got into groups of the wrong friends. I was seeking acceptance and self-worth in other people. I dabbled in witchcraft, got into meth and drinking, and I slept with boys out of wedlock. I was lost. At 17 years old, I got pregnant. I immediately knew I had to sober up. The young man that got me pregnant begged me to abort. But in my heart, I knew that was wrong. We ended up going our separate ways and I had a little girl.
I was a single parent living with my parents. When I told my parents I was pregnant, they went through a lot of different emotions. They never broke relationship with me. They came alongside me and helped me. They also continued to pray for me. After hopping around from guy to guy, I had enough. I drew a line in the sand and decided I wanted to settle down and have a family. That’s when I met my wonderful Husband. He had 2 children, an ex-wife and baggage. He didn’t follow the Lord or even know about Jesus. At this time, I was 21.
We got married 2 years later. It was a hard road to say the least. We would fight hard, throw things and just be horrible to each other. I was constantly calling my Mom, and crying to her. She would always give me godly council and advice. My marriage was failing. I blamed my Husband a lot. I wanted him to change. I had 50 different false expectations in my marriage. I ended up moving out and my Husband and I separated. He wanted a divorce.
It was in this hour I began praying to God. I was desperate. I was desperate for God to change ME. For months, I would go to work, pick up my daughter and then go home and pray. I prayed for healing and restoration in my broken marriage and with my children. My parents were praying for me and my family. My Grandparents were praying for me and my family.
Then, on our court date to finalize our divorce, my Husband changed his mind. God moved. God showed himself. We decided to work hard to change our old habits. We decided to make God FIRST in our marriage. God wasn’t done with me yet. During the next few years we did a lot of changing. We had a whole new appreciation for each other. We appreciated the Lord for giving us a second chance.
And then, when I was 33 years old, I became so bored with the day-to-day life. I thought, “is this all there is?” So I started a war room in my house. I had an extra bedroom in the house and spent every morning in prayer. I would pray for people at our church, pray for my children, read the Bible and just talk to the Lord. I was desperate again! You see, during my life I still went to church, I just had no relationship with Jesus. In fact, I couldn’t even raise my hands in worship. Worship at church always made me uncomfortable. But I knew there had to be more. In Jeremiah 29:13 it says, “you will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart.” So that’s what I did.
Then Jesus did it again. One day I was praying on the couch and all of a sudden this electrifying power came over me. I immediately raised my hands. I could not stop laying them down. I was shaking and crying uncontrollably. I called my mom, and I remember her happy crying and saying, “That’s the Holy Spirit.” From that day forward God would transform not only my Husbands’ and my life, but us. I became addicted to Jesus. I wanted nothing more than to spend time with my Lord. I was baptized in Holy Spirit fire and ready for more. Holy Spirit started waking me up every night around 3am just to spend time together. This in itself was pretty incredible since I took medication to sleep at night. I would get up and go in my war room, worship with my hands held high and pray. This became our routine. Then one night, I heard Him speak. He would then tell me things about people that would be dear to their hearts. I would write out letters to people from Jesus. I got to see visions and feel feelings for the people I was writing to but through Christs’ eyes. I witnessed people crying as they read these letters. I heard some say, “How could you have known that?”
This season of my life became a snowball of miraculous events. Every time God would show up, it left me humbled and in Awe of His mighty power and who He is. My Husband got to experience this with me. He became a worshiper too! Today, we have a healthy, loving marriage of 18 years and together for 20 years. My Husband is so precious to me. I give all the glory to my first love, Jesus. He is the absolute lover of my soul. The one I cherish, the one I adore, and I’m completely in love with Him.
You see my friend, if it had not been for my praying Grandparents or my praying parents, where would I be? Lost, empty, hurting. But they did. God heard their prayers and intervened.
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